Equality and Personal Achievement: What's the Link?

What is your view of the relationship between equality and personal success?

September 16, 2024
Gaurav Chhikara
PTE Academic
Essay Sample Answer

Essay Question

In recent years, there has been growing interest in the relationship between equality and personal achievement. Some people believe that individuals can achieve more in egalitarian societies. Others believe that high levels of personal achievement are possible only if individuals are free to succeed or fail according to their individual merits. What is your view of the relationship between equality and personal success?

90-Points (9 Bands) Sample Answer for Essay

The debate on whether the relationship between equality and personal achievement enables individuals to achieve more in egalitarian societies encompasses diverse viewpoints, revealing its advantages and drawbacks. This essay critically assesses these perspectives.

There are myriad arguments in favour of my stance. Recent research not only outlines the significance of studies as well as people, but also points out the importance of education and coping with vicissitudes. Besides, it provides a brief overview of expanding cultural understanding, followed by enhancing global perspectives. Examples of this can be seen all over the world, especially in affluent nations. Further, the implications of technological advancements on these views are significant, justifying widespread support for the idea that the relationship between equality and personal achievement enables individuals to achieve more in egalitarian societies.

However, there are some arguments against the aforementioned view. Besides, its impact is far-reaching indeed as its influence extends to various facets of society, shaping not only individual experiences but also impacting the academic research landscape. Therefore, it is apparent why many are against the notion that the relationship between equality and personal achievement enables individuals to achieve more in egalitarian societies.

In conclusion, while the viewpoint that the relationship between equality and personal achievement enables individuals to achieve more in egalitarian societies presents a complex array of advantages and disadvantages, my analysis leads me to firmly support the notion that its benefits substantially outweigh the drawbacks.

*By utilizing the AGBS template, this model answer secures full marks in the PTE Academic exam. Scoring for the Essay Question-type depends on various factors including Content, Form, Grammar, Vocabulary Range, Spelling, General Linguistic Range, and Development, Structure, and Coherence. The picture below illustrates how this answer achieves full scores as per these criteria!

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You can confidently use this Essay Answer in the PTE Academic exam with similar results. You can even try it for yourself right now, click the link below and check immediately. Remember to type it all out, rather than copy pasting, as it will help you in getting prepared.

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Template used in this Essay Sample Answer

Before you start typing, consider memorizing the whole template. Here is the template for the AGBS essay type. You know that PTE essays come in two forms: AGBS and PS. Both templates have a similar structure but differ slightly in text to suit each essay type.

Agree Disagree / Both Sides Template

The debate on whether TS* encompasses diverse viewpoints, revealing its advantages and drawbacks. This essay critically assesses these perspectives.

In conclusion, while the viewpoint that TS* presents a complex array of advantages and disadvantages, my analysis leads me to firmly support the notion that its benefits substantially outweigh the drawbacks.

*Now, with the above template, you only have to add one phrase (a TS), which almost looks like a sentence.

What is TS?

The Topic Sentence (The TS) is a clear and short statement that uses the main words of an essay. It fits into a specific structure where rest of the essay is already written, so only the TS needs to be created. This helps keep the essay on track and makes sure it stays positive or neutral. The TS uses important words from the essay topic and is designed to be simple, avoiding tricky words or negative phrases.

Example TS for the current essay:

'the relationship between equality and personal achievement enables individuals to achieve more in egalitarian societies'

What makes this TS suitable?

The TS "the relationship between equality and personal achievement enables individuals to achieve more in egalitarian societies" is appropriate for the essay topic because it clearly highlights a connection between equality and personal success. This statement suggests that when everyone has equal opportunities, individuals can reach greater heights in their achievements. It directly relates to the essay prompt, which discusses how equality impacts personal achievement, making it relevant and focused.

The TS uses important terms from the essay topic, such as "equality," "personal achievement," and "egalitarian societies." These words are essential because they reflect the main ideas of the essay prompt. By including these terms, the TS shows an understanding of the topic and sets the stage for exploring how equality contributes to success.

From a grammatical standpoint, the sentence is correct. It has a clear subject ("the relationship between equality and personal achievement") and a complete thought ("enables individuals to achieve more in egalitarian societies"). The verb "enables" properly agrees with the subject, and there are no spelling errors, which helps maintain clarity.

The TS is also rich in keywords that directly relate to the essay topic. Words like "relationship," "equality," "personal achievement," and "egalitarian societies" are crucial for discussing how these concepts interact. This focus on specific ideas strengthens the essay and improves its relevance to the prompt.

Overall, the TS effectively establishes a positive viewpoint on the benefits of equality in achieving personal success. It serves as a solid foundation for further discussion about how egalitarian societies can foster greater achievements among individuals, making it a strong choice for the essay.

Important Words for Relevancy + Content Scores

To make your own TS, which should contain words related to the essay topic, here is a list of such words and phrases. These words are directly drawn from the essay prompt, providing you with several ideas for your TS.

Growing Interest: Growing interest refers to an increasing curiosity or attention towards a particular topic or issue. For example, in recent years, there has been a growing interest in how equality affects personal achievement.
Relationship: A relationship is a connection or association between two or more things. For instance, the relationship between equality and personal achievement can influence how individuals succeed in life.
Equality: Equality means treating everyone the same and giving them the same opportunities. For example, societies that promote equality often help all individuals reach their potential.
Personal Achievement: Personal achievement refers to the success an individual attains through their own efforts. For instance, someone might feel a sense of personal achievement after completing a challenging project.
Individuals: Individuals are single persons, distinct from a group. For example, each individual has unique talents and abilities that contribute to their achievements.
Egalitarian Societies: Egalitarian societies are communities that strive for equal rights and opportunities for all people. For example, in egalitarian societies, everyone has a fair chance to succeed regardless of their background.
Society: Society refers to a group of people living together in a community, sharing customs and institutions. For example, society plays a significant role in shaping individuals' values and opportunities.
High Levels: High levels refer to a significant degree or amount of something. For example, societies with high levels of equality often see more individuals succeed in their personal and professional lives.
Level: Level refers to a specific stage or degree of something. For instance, achieving a high level of education can lead to better job opportunities.
Free: Free means not being restricted or controlled. For example, when people have free access to education, they can pursue their dreams without barriers.
Succeed: To succeed means to achieve a desired goal or outcome. For example, many people hope to succeed in their careers and make a positive impact in their communities.
Fail: To fail means to not achieve a desired goal or outcome. For instance, failing a test can be disappointing, but it can also be a chance to learn and improve.
Success: Success refers to the accomplishment of a goal or the attainment of wealth, position, or honours. For example, success can be measured in different ways, such as achieving personal goals or gaining recognition in a career.
Failure: Failure is the lack of success in achieving a goal. For instance, experiencing failure can provide important lessons that help individuals grow.
Merits: Merits are the advantages or positive qualities of something. For example, the merits of equality include improved opportunities for all individuals to achieve their goals.
View: A view is a particular opinion or way of thinking about something. For example, different people may have different views on how equality affects personal achievement.

Use these suggested words to craft your own TS. Then, complete the template provided above and submit it to our AI for evaluation. Continue refining only the TS until you get full marks. This is the quickest way to prepare for the writing section of the PTE Academic test.

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